I remember when I was little and anticipation for my birthday or Christmas struck. I could feel it so vividly, it would overcome me with electric vibration. I wouldn’t be able to sleep the night before because I knew just what the next day would bring, only great things. I felt this last night. I couldn’t understand why and then I woke with the same excitement and anticipation. I realised, it was my son’s birthday and this was his energy. The more I meditate and connect to who I am the more I learn about how deeply I am really connected to those around me, I can feel their energy. It brought a humbling reminder to me that we get so lost in our own adult lives that any sort of joy or excitement gets swallowed whole by work, family, friends. It’s like we can’t even enjoy those things anymore, they’re either routine or a struggle to really relax into.
It’s harder when you have children because you are unable to live your life as you once pleased. You must readjust and most of the time my life is now spent revolving around others, their needs and time frames and not my own. I don’t get to make time for me to indulge a catch up with a friend, no plans are set to look forward to, no break awaits and no sicks days exist. I am completely absorbed in my daily struggle to survive. This experience has taught me an important reminder as not only how important it is to not forget to take an intentional time to enjoy life but why it is important. We forget who we are and why we exist. We don’t enjoy any part of it and what existence would be worthwhile if all we do is sacrifice and suffer. Now a lot of other people are able to receive the helping hand they need and take some much need me-time and couple-time but we don’t and thankfully we try to work in our early morning quiet times and evening rest times once the children are asleep.
It was sad to think that all this time I had forgotten the excitement that should be felt in our lives, that we are worth celebrating and life is worth celebrating and we should feel that so deeply, but we don’t. We are swallowed by work deadlines, stresses and trying relationships. The trifecta that destroys us because while we are trying to feel something we’re filling the hollow in ourselves with things that invoke no sense of activation to us. We’re still remaining empty and lifeless. I really hope you get a chance to remember and hold on to that joy and excitement you once had, that you never let it go. We should always feel like so vividly and project our emotions so clearly that we can use it as a guide. Our emotions are our instincts when we are happy we are in a positive place if we’re sad we’re in a negative one, but we seem to ignore it and keep going when we should just let it be.
I really hope this encourages you to take some time and remember how it feels to experience life through the eyes of your inner child and maybe your life will begin to blossom once again. I am really thankful for my beautiful children and the inner child reminding me to stop and feel, to really begin to understand others and myself through emotions. Emotions are a powerful guide that we can trust if we really listen to what they are telling us.
Esoteric Realms 