ease – Esoteric Realms

For a while now I’ve noticed a tight heart feeling inside me. This started after my first child was born. I’ve only realised now how I’ve felt for a long time, that I had to be in control of every situation because I simply couldn’t depend on any else to come and help me when I so desperately needed it. This was even before having children. I had been pushed into an overactive state and never really got to release myself out of it. When it seems like everyone else in your life has expectations and negative responses for you, you begin to work overtime.

Mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually I can feel how much damage it has done so far and how I can’t relax properly. I never unwind. Today is one of those days where I finally noticed how much I’ve learnt from my own short journey with meditation and reflection. I was meant to be moving the mass of boxes into our new home, I was going to be pre-emptive with how much I could achieve before actual deadlines would appear but I began to let go and realise how overactive I am functioning in this thought pattern. How again, I had a plan to help myself but today was having none of it.

I’m going to move a small load on my own, I’m okay with this because despite how much I would try my best in this situation if roles were reversed I have to stop projecting what I’ve been forced to do onto others and that we tend to do this a lot. We put unnecessary pressure and expectations onto a certain situation or person because it’s become a very unhealthy learned habit and we break them down instead of allowing them some grace. This isn’t because of personality it’s because of conditioning over the years that others played the guilt card and when you’re an Empath it’s easy to begin to get played on the basis of emotion. “You must because” or your ability to choose gets taken away. A lot of people like to respond and say “well, you can say no”! Actually, no you can’t we say no and it goes pear shaped very quickly usually with their response that is narcissistic, abusive or controlling. We back down and begin to stop fighting back it’s easier to just stay silent, to be a slave and just keep trying to do the right thing under a fear fuelled pressure.

We need to begin to break the cycle of how we manage our expectations and not allow ourselves to automatically revert to a constant pushing for results. Sometimes we need to go with the flow. This is who I was before and under the actions of those who switched me from free-flowing to overactive, I try to not do this to others and you should too. Be aware of how you respond and understand if you are blocked or overactive in your approach. Are you calm or frustrated, collected or about to lose the plot? Well, take a minute and step back from it and ask yourself “How am I responding?” tell yourself honestly the “why” and begin to deal with it. Life doesn’t happen on our watch, it happens as it does, it’s how we respond to it that really counts.

I hope you all enjoy your happy Saturday xx

I hope you all take some time to hit the refresh button this lovely Sunday and just relax. I find it very hard to do this as there is always something to do, but I’ve had to start making the time.

How many times do we push ourselves to the brink of exhaustion, everything we do is under pressure and we rush and hurry. As a mother this is bound to happen, trying to get a toddler and baby ready then somehow myself. Everyone depends on me to do things for them and others call on me because I’m dependable and always happy to help but in amongst this I forget me. I forget how important I am and I forget how to relax and unwind, mostly because I feel like I can’t or shouldn’t or don’t have the option to. Sound familiar?

This is where I had to acknowledge my pattern of behaviour and how negatively it was affecting me. I had to learn to let go of the rush and time press and just let things sit for a minute because making time to do things is as almost as important as being able to relax and re-centre yourself. Leave all the weight at the door and enter your own sanctuary where you can find peace to carry throughout your day. I try to be very intentional with my mornings and start my day off with #futureselfjournaling and just let the dishes be, they’re always going to exist.

What seems to be lacking is my ability to unwind for a minute and finding my focus for the day. Without, I realised how unsettled I am.

I encourage you, just take a minute with a cup of something and sit outside, turn your room into a cove of peace or even in the shower and most importantly leave the phone behind. Just breathe, focus on something your day seems to revolve around and begin to speak life into it, see it in your mind how well will go and how successful it will be. If things go another way not planned to your expectations, learn to be thankful for it and learn to accept the things we have no control over, learn to see it as a necessary outcome as much as things must happen so they mustn’t. We seem to be angered at the thought that something we have revolved out thought and emotion around and invested doesn’t come to fruition, we built ourselves up for frustration instead of seeing with new eyes and allowing things to take us down a different path and to see it is good too.

Ready yourself for a day with a focus and hopefully, you’ll be able to feel the calm wash over you. You’ll find your centre and be ready to approach this day with new thoughts and fresh emotions. As a parent, I try to do this when both my children are happy and occupied or asleep. It doesn’t take long and just sets us all up for a great if not, wonderful day.

As a parent this is apart of my change into conscious parenting. It will make a difference as a worker, as a parent, child, every individual. This is NOT just sitting and doing nothing, you are purposefully breaking a habit and creating a new one where you a letting go of the negative thoughts and feelings and deciding to take on new positive ones instead. You are aligning yourself to a new way of living and being. You are choosing to be better, calming, more conscious of yourself and of others.

I hope you enjoy your day and try a new mindset, wear calm and feel the strength from your new set day.

Tag: ease

Learning to accept the Flow of Life

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